Wednesday, November 2, 2011

Dia De Los Muertos part II

Today is the day we celebrate the dearly departed. All day long I've thought about this and what I was going to post in my blog. I have decided to remember a great man. He was not a famous inventor, nor a war hero in a major battle, nor was he a rich philanthropist. But he is a man that I want to be more like. I am talking about my grandfather, Julio.

Why is it that my grandfather was a great man? The reason is simple, but cannot be overlooked. He was the anchor of our family his entire life. He made sure his family was united and got them through anything that life put in their way. He lost his first wife when they were young, my dad being only 5 years old. He was left alone to raise 3 boys. No one would have blamed him if he had lost it, given up and left his kids to be raised by relatives. But that was not an option. He continued to fight and made sure his kids had everything they needed, if not everything they wanted. He worked hard all his life and he made sure that his children learned the value of hard work. He remarried later in life and had 4 more children by his second wife. He loved them all and loved his grandchildren and great-grandchildren just the same.

My grandfather was a very likable person. He always tried to treat everyone fairly, whether they be an adult his age or a child. You dared not mistreat anyone in front of him. Wherever he went people knew him and would talk to him. He was affectionately known as "Don Julio" by his friends and neighbors. To my brother and me he was known as "Papito Julio," the caring, loving grandfather. No matter who you were or what your background, Papito Julio always treated you the same and made sure you were welcome in his house. He never looked down on anyone. One story of his that I will never forget involves a visit he made to the US. For a time he and his three sons lived in Tijuana. One afternoon he crossed the border into the US for a visit and decided to take in a movie. Now this was a time when segregation was still a part of life and the theater was divided into a "white" and a "colored" section. Not being aware of this, my grandfather sat in the "colored" section. Now Mexicans at the time had it rough. They really didn't belong in either group but were somehow considered "white" for the purposes of segregation. An usher came by and informed him that he could not sit there. My grandfather asked the usher the reason for this. The usher informed him about the different sections and my grandfather was so appalled that he left right then and there. This had a major impact on him and it may be part of the reason that he always treated everyone with the same amount of respect.

I have many fond memories of the times I spend with Papito Julio. We were lucky enough to have him visit us from time to time. My brother and I would wake up early and fix him pancakes for breakfast. He in turn would make us a big pot of coffee, Mexican-style. (That's where you add coffee grounds to a pot directly and heat on the stove. He would also add a couple of sticks of cinnamon.) Pancakes and Mexican-style coffee, what a breakfast. I don't recall how good the pancakes we made were, but in his opinion they were the best because his grandkids had made them. That's another thing about him, he was never one to turn down food that someone offered him. He could have just finished a big meal, but if you offered him a bit he would accept so as to not hurt your feelings. Papito Julio loved to eat and he hated to waste food. Growing up poor in Mexico, he realized that food was precious and not to be thrown out. He was also never afraid to try anything new.

One year Papito Julio went with us on our family trip to Florida and Disney World. I had never seen a man his age act like such a kid! His eyes were full of joy and excitement at all there was to see. I think that my family got more joy from seeing him have such a good time than from any attraction there. On our first day at the theme parks, my mom asked him if he thought it'd be a good idea to rent a wheelchair. I'll never forget the look on her face when he said, "Why? You think you're going to need it?" There was no way he was going to be put into a wheelchair that day! He was used to walking; in Mexico City he preferred to walk everywhere, regardless of the distance.

Although Papito Julio has passed away, I have made a vow to never let his memory fade. My kids hear stories about him and how we are all a little like him. One of his favorite kind of movies were kung-fu and Bruce Lee movies. My parents would rent him a stack of movies each time he visited and we would stay up late watching them. Nowadays my sons love watching Bruce Lee movies and have been in martial arts for almost two years. I can't help but think that if he's watching us from heaven, he smiles when he sees them. We also love to eat almost as much as he did. He also had a great sense of humor and I will always remember him as a smiling, laughing, very jolly person. As my sons and I get older, I hope that we all become a little more like him.
Papito Julio in the middle, with my parents on either side.

Papito Julio with his second wife, Elena whom I grew up with as my grandmother.

Papito Julio as a young man.
One last thing. I said that I would explain the items I placed on his altar. There is the Pan de Muerto, of course. I also added a Mexican flag because he was born in Mexico. Also there is a Mexican pastry known as a concha, one of his favorites. I also placed a package of Abuelita brand Mexican chocolate, another favorite of his. (He liked to eat the chocolate right out of the package as well as mixing it with milk for hot chocolate.) There are also some logos of his favorite soccer team, the Pumas. I also added a bottle of tequila, another traditional Mexican addition to the altar. Also there are some rosary beads, a candle with La Virgen de Guadalupe and a bottle of holy water because he was a devout Catholic.

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Dia De Los Muertos (Day of the Dead) Part I

Yesterday was Halloween, but for Mexicans the next two days are also observed. November 1st is All Hallows Day, or All Saints Day. November 2nd is All Souls Day. There are many questions about this celebration and its origins. I will try my best to enlighten you about it.

The Day of the Dead celebrations are a mix of pre-Columbian and Christian influences. To the native peoples of Mexico, death was in important part of life. There was a strong belief in  the afterlife and to them death was just another step, not the end. It was common for them to keep and display the skulls of the dead as both trophies of battle and as remembrance of loved ones that had passed. This influence can still be seen today as colorful sugar skulls and painted paper mache skulls adorn the altars of homes. It is a common practice to purchase a sugar or chocolate skull and have your best friend's name written on it. Your best friend does the same and you exchange the skulls on Day of the Dead. This serves as a reminder that we are all mortal and will one day be nothing but bones ourselves. But rather than be spooked or feel somber about this, it reminds us to live life to its fullest and enjoy the time we share with each other while we are still on earth.

Every year near the end of October, as the weather gets colder in the northern hemisphere, millions of monarch butterflies make their way south. It is an impressive sight as they all arrive in the same general area in order to spawn. This migration takes them all the way to the heart of Mexico, just a short distance from Mexico City. The natives that witnessed this were in complete awe. They interpreted this as the souls of warriors that were allowed to return once a year. It is the modern belief that the souls of our loved ones that have passed return to visit us this time of year to check on us and let us know that they will never completely leave us.

When the church arrived in Mexico it brought with it the observance of All Hallows Day on November 1st. Today that is traditionally seen as the day to remember the saints and the children that have passed. November 2nd is the day to remember adults that have passed. Families set up altars in honor of these loved ones. Items placed on the altar bear a significance to the dearly departed. These can include pan de muerto (bread of the dead), favorite food items they liked to eat in life, candles, flowers, pictures of them, tequila and anything else that might remind the family of their loved one.

Another custom is to visit the graves and clean them up, place fresh flowers and even have a picnic at the cemetery. In some towns it is not unusual to spend the entire night in the cemetery. Torches are lit and everyone joins in remembering all those that have passed. To an outsider, this might seem like a morbid custom. But to the people of Mexico and Latin America, nothing could be further from the truth. Whether or not you believe that the person's soul actually returns or not, we realize that by remembering them we keep a part of them alive and ensure that they are never truly gone. We share stories about them and reminisce about the good times we shared with them. That's not morbid, that's a wonderful thing!

These traditions vary from town to town and region to region, but the core is there. These are days to remember our loved ones and to make sure that the younger generations never forget them. We celebrate their lives and also celebrate life itself. Though we may cry because we miss them, we realize that they will never be gone forever as long as we keep their memory alive. We also realize that we will be reunited one day when our time is up. I leave you with a couple of pictures of the altar I set up for my grandpa who passed away 2 years ago. Tomorrow I will talk about the items on the altar and about my grandpa.